I’d like to start it off by saying fuck the world.
Fuck neighbors with loud barking dogs, ignorant people with money, roommates with poor organizational skills, small children, any hour before 10:30am, warm beer, people who don’t return phone calls, people who care about celebrities, women who think they’re fat, Arnold Schwarzenegger, the fact that Schwarzenegger is in my spell check and Funkadelic is not, random construction with no apparent workers, people who don’t take care of their pets, fashion, zombies, electronic failures, human failures, stalkers, ex girlfriends, insects that make noise, paying upwards of $3 for a cup of coffee, giving cell phones to young children, day jobs and last but certainly not least, fuck Lance Armstrong. Fuck him, his stretchy yellow pants and resulting lopsided bulge. Where I’m from, you’d get your ass kicked for wearing shit like that. And I’m from an affluent suburb in the most liberal state in the nation.
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